My NT (nuerotypical) son has my husband and father’s dry, raw sense of humor. He has the ability to make me laugh in almost any situation. I can be so frustrated with him and he can still make me laugh. It is really annoying at times, but it is a great strategy for our family.
Sometimes his jokes are truly funny and anyone anywhere would laugh. Other times they are related to a specific dynamic and only those who understand that dynamic (Autism, for example) would see the humor and other times only we, the immediate family, get it.
As we got in the car to head to the bus stop yesterday morning the “Christmas Shoes” song was on (the one about the little boy who wants to buy shoes for his mommy to go to heaven and meet Jesus). The song has always tugged at my heartstrings, but brought me to tears within 2 or 3 notes this morning. My father died, peacefully in his sleep, after a fairly lengthy fight with COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease) this June. This Christmas is and will continue to be rough. We all miss him very much. I immediately turned the volume all the way down and mumbled “I can’t listen to this song.” My son asked what the song was and why. I explained the song while tears fell from my eyes.
My son turned to me and said, full of compassion and sorrow, “But mom, Grandad wasn’t wearing shoes.” And he smiled that smile he has. I had to laugh.
I miss my dad beyond words but I know he is with us every day in our hearts and my son’s sense of humor. But, I swear I heard him laugh too, because he would have thought it funny that a song about a boy buying shoes for his mom made this daddy’s girl cry about the loss of her barefoot father.